Moving on

Sometimes we need someone to tell us -its all ok, things are going to get better, all problems will get sorted out, what we want will come about, things will work out- often with a liner- we just have to work at it and it will be done. We get such reassurance from others every time we are in trouble. Sometimes we reassure ourselves with these same very words and tactics. Tell ourselves- I will make sure that such-and-such situation never arises again, I will work hard, I will do all I want to do...

I am done with such reassurances- from myself and others. I think I have overdrawn on my permissible quota anyway. I am tired of it. I cant hear another reassuring word anymore. I want to scream out saying- stop, you're doing it again, you are doing what I dont have the will to hear.

I dont know how much of my will can survive if I get rid of these comforting expressions. What does survive will make me, or destroy me forever. Either way, the prospect is infinitely better.